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Sunday, April 15, 2007

Hurricane

As of now I am in the midst of a hurricane. I am in the center it is now saturday bight and I have juust soent most of the after noon talkning to ym dad. I thought that I had had a hard day last tuesday but that pailed in commpareson to what has transpired from last thursday to now. Thursday satred witha phone call from shane sayin that Dad had been moved back to CMICU. I just so happend that Sydney had an appoint ment at Dornbeckers hospital for her new borne checkup. So were were going to be up there at 1:15.

posted by rogue at 1:22 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Butterfly Wings

Over the last few days much of my strife and fear has pealed away to revel a new hope that is beginning to gush forth like a long buried spring finally reaching the surface. My father’s health has significantly improved. Last night he was moved from the CMICU (Cardiac Medical Intensive Care Unit) back to the BMT (Bone Marrow Transplant) unit. Though there is a long road of recovery ahead things are getting better and I feel they will continue to do so. For this I am much relieved. Since I learned of the return of caner to my father’s body I have been filled with dread for this passage of my life. I was so scared of the timing. I want my Daughter To know her grand father, and I have been so scared for the worst. But now these fears have turned to hope. I am beginning to realize that Sydney and my father needed each other. In this moment is seems to me that the timing was not bad it was perfect. As I lay in bed trying to fall asleep I visualized their relationship as a pair of butterfly wings. On either side are two beautifully adorned wings, broad at the ends and joined at a single point in the center. Like deep-sea water currents their two energy's pass back and forth giving each other just what they need. One cannot exist with out the other. As I am writing this it is becoming clear to me that I am at the center of this relation ship, this figure of infinity. I am going to be a father while I am still a son.

posted by rogue at 1:39 AM 0 comments

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  • Submission to This American Life
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